The most written about subject on this unpredictable planet of ours. Wars have been fought over it, millions of songs have been written about it, hearts have been broken… Countless good and bad poems, books and movies have love as the central theme… It’s this emotion that makes pubs, record companies and dating sites exist. Money makes the world go round, but according to Elizabeth Browning love is what makes the ride worthwhile. For years to come man and woman will continue this search for the four-letter L word. So what pearl of wisdom can I possibly add to this - the most overused, misunderstood and most desirable emotion of all time? The big guns like Shakespeare have already cornered the market. And it’s tough coming up with anything better than 1 Corinthians 13. Go read it again – it’s truly beautiful.
So for once I decide to do some Google research. I type in the word ‘love’ and within 0.25 seconds I am presented with 1,340 million results. I'm in way over my head here. Maybe I should rather just write about Romance. Within 0.12 seconds I have 194 million results. Okay, back to ‘love’ it is… I start scrolling down the page, searching for enlightenment. And lo and behold there it is: HOW TO LOVE. 8 STEPS. (WITH PICTURES) With pictures?! Are they serious? Note to self: Double-check what my teenage daughter is Googling. Of course I double click on the ‘how to love in 8 steps with pictures’. I’m human afterall and this is known as doing research… What did I discover? Trust me, save yourself the trouble. I find the average article on dealing with varicose veins at the doctor’s waiting room way more interesting than the drivel they came up with. For eg. Step one… Find someone you like… (Hello!)
So I decide to do some face to face research. Starting with an expert on the current world of romance and teenage love – my 15 (going-on-26) year old.
This is what I discovered: When you are 15, love is…
….getting an illegible (well, at least to your mother) message on your Blackberry from your cyber boyfriend. Just a modern version of the old-fashioned love letter I suppose… Actually in this technological age, the written word is making a come-back. Hence the popularity of wall quotes… Walls are adorned with positive, inspiring sayings… Words in all shapes and forms are seen in the best-dressed homes. Peace, hope, faith, family, celebrate, joy etc. And of course that most enigmatic word of all – love. I’ve also had a ‘relêx’ and an ‘eish’ for sale… But I digress… Back to the 15 year old expert who informs me that the ultimate love story is that between a vampire and a human… Like many girls her age she’s been completely taken by the Twilight Saga. Who am I to judge?… In my day it was the Rocky Horror Picture Show…
Next I interview my reluctant husband about the meaning of true love. Hard to pin him down – he’s channel-hopping. He can only concentrate on what I’m saying during ad breaks.
I suppose that’s one version of true love: still loving him eventhough he prefers Top Gear to my scintillating conversation. Finally I manage to get an answer from him between NCIS and CSI:
True love is helping your wife do the flowers at the 50th birthday party of another man – eventhough it is in fact your own birthday. And this is the actual truth. He did it. For me. Vowed never ever again, but he did. I swear Percy is a saint. Some readers have asked me if my hubby doesn’t get upset about the stuff I write. In my defense: I only write the truth.
Maybe true love is about softening the truth a bit… No, it’s not lying… what do you mean? It’s completely different from lying.
My man staan byvoorbeeld altyd reg met ‘n ‘jy lyk pragtig’ nog voor ek behoorlik uitgekom met met die vraag: Lyk ek darem…(skaflik)? ‘Jy lyk pragtig, skat.’ Noudat ek daaraan dink, dis darem te maklik… Seker maar jare se kondisionering. Nou die oggend sit ons en tee drink op die stoep en hy kyk met so ‘n ver af verliefde uitdrukking na my… My hart raak warm. ‘En as jy so na my kyk, my lief?’vra ek koketterig. ‘Huh?... Nee, ek word nog wakker.” Ware liefde voorwaar. Van my kant af.
So wat doen jy hierdie jaar op Valentynsdag vir jou geliefde? Ja, baie mense dink dis net ‘n geldmaakstorie. Maar om vir jou liefie ‘n blommetjie te pluk of te bederf met ‘n spesiale ontbyt kos jou niks – of gebruik jy die geld of die moeite as verskoning om niks te doen nie. Ek vra maar net.
Daar is ‘n wonderlike verhaal van ‘n jong tienermeisie wat sielsongelukkig was omdat sy nie ‘n kêrel gehad het nie. Sy was vas oortuig dat sy te vet, te lelik of te dom was. Een jaar kry sy vir die eerste keer ‘n Valentynskaartjie van ‘n geheime bewonderaar. Dit het haar hele lewe verander. Sy het uit haar dop begin kruip, stadig vriende op skool begin maak want sy het geweet iewers is daar iemand wat vir haar omgee. So het sy elke jaar ‘n Valentynskaartjie gekry van dieselfde geheime bewonderaar. Sy het elke kaartjie bewaar. En wanneer sy bietjie 'af' was, het sy die kaartjies oor en oor gelees en beter gevoel. Selfs na sy getroud is, het haar geheime bewonderaar aangehou om vir haar kaartjies te stuur. Klokslag. Elke 14e Februarie is ‘n kaartjie by haar huis afgelewer. Maart 2002 is haar pa oorlede. Die volgende Valentynsdag was daar nie ‘n kaartjie in die posbus nie…
Maak ‘n verskil in iemand se lewe hierdie Valentynsdag… Sommer elke dag.
So for once I decide to do some Google research. I type in the word ‘love’ and within 0.25 seconds I am presented with 1,340 million results. I'm in way over my head here. Maybe I should rather just write about Romance. Within 0.12 seconds I have 194 million results. Okay, back to ‘love’ it is… I start scrolling down the page, searching for enlightenment. And lo and behold there it is: HOW TO LOVE. 8 STEPS. (WITH PICTURES) With pictures?! Are they serious? Note to self: Double-check what my teenage daughter is Googling. Of course I double click on the ‘how to love in 8 steps with pictures’. I’m human afterall and this is known as doing research… What did I discover? Trust me, save yourself the trouble. I find the average article on dealing with varicose veins at the doctor’s waiting room way more interesting than the drivel they came up with. For eg. Step one… Find someone you like… (Hello!)
So I decide to do some face to face research. Starting with an expert on the current world of romance and teenage love – my 15 (going-on-26) year old.
This is what I discovered: When you are 15, love is…
….getting an illegible (well, at least to your mother) message on your Blackberry from your cyber boyfriend. Just a modern version of the old-fashioned love letter I suppose… Actually in this technological age, the written word is making a come-back. Hence the popularity of wall quotes… Walls are adorned with positive, inspiring sayings… Words in all shapes and forms are seen in the best-dressed homes. Peace, hope, faith, family, celebrate, joy etc. And of course that most enigmatic word of all – love. I’ve also had a ‘relêx’ and an ‘eish’ for sale… But I digress… Back to the 15 year old expert who informs me that the ultimate love story is that between a vampire and a human… Like many girls her age she’s been completely taken by the Twilight Saga. Who am I to judge?… In my day it was the Rocky Horror Picture Show…
Next I interview my reluctant husband about the meaning of true love. Hard to pin him down – he’s channel-hopping. He can only concentrate on what I’m saying during ad breaks.
I suppose that’s one version of true love: still loving him eventhough he prefers Top Gear to my scintillating conversation. Finally I manage to get an answer from him between NCIS and CSI:
True love is helping your wife do the flowers at the 50th birthday party of another man – eventhough it is in fact your own birthday. And this is the actual truth. He did it. For me. Vowed never ever again, but he did. I swear Percy is a saint. Some readers have asked me if my hubby doesn’t get upset about the stuff I write. In my defense: I only write the truth.
Maybe true love is about softening the truth a bit… No, it’s not lying… what do you mean? It’s completely different from lying.
My man staan byvoorbeeld altyd reg met ‘n ‘jy lyk pragtig’ nog voor ek behoorlik uitgekom met met die vraag: Lyk ek darem…(skaflik)? ‘Jy lyk pragtig, skat.’ Noudat ek daaraan dink, dis darem te maklik… Seker maar jare se kondisionering. Nou die oggend sit ons en tee drink op die stoep en hy kyk met so ‘n ver af verliefde uitdrukking na my… My hart raak warm. ‘En as jy so na my kyk, my lief?’vra ek koketterig. ‘Huh?... Nee, ek word nog wakker.” Ware liefde voorwaar. Van my kant af.
So wat doen jy hierdie jaar op Valentynsdag vir jou geliefde? Ja, baie mense dink dis net ‘n geldmaakstorie. Maar om vir jou liefie ‘n blommetjie te pluk of te bederf met ‘n spesiale ontbyt kos jou niks – of gebruik jy die geld of die moeite as verskoning om niks te doen nie. Ek vra maar net.
Daar is ‘n wonderlike verhaal van ‘n jong tienermeisie wat sielsongelukkig was omdat sy nie ‘n kêrel gehad het nie. Sy was vas oortuig dat sy te vet, te lelik of te dom was. Een jaar kry sy vir die eerste keer ‘n Valentynskaartjie van ‘n geheime bewonderaar. Dit het haar hele lewe verander. Sy het uit haar dop begin kruip, stadig vriende op skool begin maak want sy het geweet iewers is daar iemand wat vir haar omgee. So het sy elke jaar ‘n Valentynskaartjie gekry van dieselfde geheime bewonderaar. Sy het elke kaartjie bewaar. En wanneer sy bietjie 'af' was, het sy die kaartjies oor en oor gelees en beter gevoel. Selfs na sy getroud is, het haar geheime bewonderaar aangehou om vir haar kaartjies te stuur. Klokslag. Elke 14e Februarie is ‘n kaartjie by haar huis afgelewer. Maart 2002 is haar pa oorlede. Die volgende Valentynsdag was daar nie ‘n kaartjie in die posbus nie…
Maak ‘n verskil in iemand se lewe hierdie Valentynsdag… Sommer elke dag.